Friida's Family
Adoption has been a test of patience, financial pressure and faith for us.
We were chosen to adopt a baby with drug exposure due in October 2014. We found out shortly after her due date, that her mom had delivered and left the hospital with her. She never intended on placing her child for adoption. Our attorney said it was a clear case of adoption fraud, and it cost us over $25,000. We were called the night before our beautiful Eleanor was born, and she was born January 2015. We still owed almost $25,000 from the failed adoption in 2014, so we had to cash out our retirement to pay off that loan in order to be able to take out another loan for Eleanor’s expenses. We were matched again with a baby with Down syndrome due December 2016. She was born early and ended up in the NICU at our local children’s hospital. I spent almost two weeks with her full time in the hospital while she was weaned off a ventilator. My husband and kiddos met her. We took a million photographs. We found out they changed their minds, when I showed up at the hospital for my visit one morning and I wasn’t on the visitation list. We lost another baby and over $10,000. Stephanie called me last summer and told me about a five-year-old girl who was being placed out of her home. She had Down syndrome like Eleanor, and she needed a good home. Allen, my husband, was deployed out of the country at the time. We discussed it over FaceTime, and I brought her home in August of last year. Allen finally got to meet her when he returned end of October. We have a loan to cover Friida’s expenses as well.
We have went from one adoption into another since 2014. While we have amazing extended families, they are not in a position to help us fund our adoptions. Between our military moves and my husbands deployments and schedule, it’s been difficult to find time to fundraise. The busy schedules of our three kids with special needs, and our lack of time to make new friends while moving, makes it tough to get involvement.
We wouldn’t change it for the world, but it has been a very expensive journey. We trust our faith in God and follow where we believe we are being led. I don’t think we’re quite done yet either.
Thanks to your grant, we have been able to help pay off our adoption loans faster than we planned. You have not only helped us with our current adoptions, but have also opened the door to being able to adopt again. We could not appreciate it more!
December 2020 update
We have been through the adoption process four times now {all for little ladies with Down syndrome}… and Eleanor and Friida are our successes.
We had an adoption attempt fail in 2014 due to adoption fraud {the most gut wrenching thing we’ve ever been through}. Eleanor was adopted at birth in 2015. We had another adoption attempt fail in 2016 when her parents changed their mind {she was placed back with them after a few weeks}. Friida was adopted at almost seven-years-old in 2017. She had been with her biological family her entire life, but she needed more help than they could provide.
We are working through the matching process now to bring home one more. We are just in a holding pattern until they let us know a birth family is interested in our family. Until then, we are focused on fundraisers and getting a nursery ready. Even in the waiting and the unknown, God is so so good.
This is Eleanor and Friida from Halloween this year. Friida is Elsa {purple} and Eleanor is Anna {blue} .
January 2022
We welcomed Winifred Wyatt Ragan into our lives on October 5th. She was born September 14, 2021, in Toledo, OH, and we discharged the NICU and headed home to Minnesota on October 15th. She has a severe case of pulmonary hypertension and will need a series of issues repaired with open-heart surgery sometime this spring, but she is doing well and loved beyond measure.
Eleanor and Friida are absolutely incredible big sisters, and we couldn’t be happier to round out our Lucky Few {Friida, Eleanor, and Winifred} squad. Thank you for always remembering our Friida’s birthday. We have a list of thank you cards to write when life calms down a little!
